Wednesday, August 5, 2020

A TENDER MOMENT (MY BIO)

Yesterday at work, the boss descended from his office to tell all the slaves that today we'll be doing a photo shoot pursuant to his social media drive which will hopefully attract more funds to our (the church's) program. He'll be posting and/or emailing our pictures in support of that effort. Boss man also wanted each employee to write a short (very short - like 25 word) bio. 

For me, this task takes all of 3 minutes. But except for one other person, it was a job they had to ponder - and then have somebody ghostwrite. While the girls stressed over what to say, I offered "it's easy. Like for me, I'll just write 'Will volunteered the day before he left for prison...and came back to volunteer the day after he came back from prison.'" 

I've never seen the girls laugh so hard. I'm not sure why it struck them as so funny. I was simply trying to downplay the difficulty of the task. But it turned into something else entirely. Maybe it was me keeping it real that struck their funny bone. Or maybe it was the reality that two of the hardest laughers have either known people who've been incarcerated - or (in one case) have a jailbird offspring.

Regardless, I took it as a vote of confidence. I don't know how the girls feel about ex-cons in general. But it sure looked like they don't judge me for my past. Which brings me to the census job I applied for. 

After careful consideration, I came to the realization that I was out of my mind when I applied. What the fuck was I thinking? As in "you wanna chase illegals down for a buck?" That's where facing the discrimination associated with being an ex-con came in handy. After officially hiring me pending only a background check, my email suddenly went silent, with the implied message "oh, hells no! Not this mother fucker. He'll turn all them illegals into ho's!" 

Not my intention. I just wanted to break the ennui of post prison life when I applied. Then I got my present job - which has effectively made life even more boring (if that's possible). In effect, I'm still in prison - doing prison-like jobs until a) this covid shit lets up...and b) I get off probation (in November). Then I'll be free to enjoy the fruits of my labor. Until then, I'll just have to live for a tender moment or two courtesy of acknowledging my past.

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